The Government Can

'Cause I may or may not be feeling a little ornery right now. Is that allowed on Sundays?

Perhaps disillusioned might be better. But then again that would mean that at some point, I was under the illusion and that's not right either.

Frustrated? Alarmed? A bit riled? I guess it really doesn't matter, this still sums it up.

The Government Can by Tim Hawkins

Humiliation Nation Goes International - Part 2

Go here if you missed the first part of this glorious story where I have one of the more humiliating moments of my life...

If the toilet could have swallowed me up, I would have gladly flushed myself. I could not believe that the entire team was waiting on me. That the entire team knew I had...had...well, you know what I had.

I begged. I pleaded. Leave without me. Let me stay in my room and get through this "issue" myself. And they would not consent. Now only had my situation become public knowledge, but now they were running late because of me. Could this get any worse?!

They would not relent and somehow missed the concept of what I was going through. Not understanding how these people could not comprehend or sympathize with my predicament, I unhappily collected myself, desperately praying that I could make it on the bus ride to our destination without some sort of accident.

I walked swiftly to the bus with my head lowered. I could not look the 20+ people (a few local pastors had joined our group now and were also aware of my problem) in the eyes knowing that they knew. Knew that I had held them up while I took care of business. I quietly answered their questions concerning my well being while my stomach continued to declare mutiny.

I sank into my seat wishing no one could see me and that this would all go away. I closed my eyes and began to just worship God. I soon found peace...in my soul and stomach. I still had some discomfort, but I knew I was safe until we reached the host church.

I sat listening to the others and continued to collect myself. Maybe they would forget. At the least they wouldn't mention it. I could put this behind me. (No pun intended.)

As someone began to engage me in conversation, one of the team leaders came over. A loud man full of zeal. He ordered me to stand up so that he could pray for me. Why hadn't I tried to flush myself?

I stood up feeling defeated. He began praying. Loudly. The others got quiet. And I...I was not feeling very spiritual at all. I have never not wanted someone to pray for me as much as right then. I fought through my emotions and tried to be thankful that these people cared.

And I was thankful.

Right up until he began yelling about my bowels. My bowels! Commanding them to function properly. My head began to swirl. My stomach began to hurt all over again.

Just when I couldn't have been more humiliated, he drove the nail in the coffin. This could not be happening. Why was I not waking up from this nightmare?

Eventually the prayer ceased. I managed to squeak out a thank you and lowered myself into my seat, thankful that the bus was dark and no one could see my face.

I love passionate people. I love to hear passionate people pray. Just not when it involves screaming about my bowels. I'm picky like that.

Why Organic Produce

I've talked a little bit about how we've made some big changes in the way we eat over the last two years. One of those changes has included adding more organic foods to our diet.

I have found it very interesting lately to see articles reporting that organic produce are no healthier than conventional produce. The problem that I have with this study is that it totally failed to examine the primary factor that motivates me to buy certain organic produce.

Pesticides. *insert evil organ music here* Those nasty chemicals that can be linked to immune and nervous system problems among other things.

The Environmental Working Group has put together a lovely list called the Dirty Dozen. Go here to take a look at the list which also includes the Clean 15. The Dirty Dozen list includes the produce that were found to be the most contaminated with pesticides.

I use both lists to help me base my decisions on what produce to buy organically on a limited budget. Just thought I'd share what I use to help make those decisions.

By the way, the list can be easily printed and kept in your purse or coupon holder and they even have an application to download to your iPhone or iPod Touch.

Humiliation Nation Goes International - Part 1

It's time. I am so overdue at sharing something completely humiliating. It's what makes me tick.
Not really, but who doesn't enjoy a good laugh? Plus, it sure does help keep me from taking myself too seriously.

I was on my very first international missions trip. It was such a huge deal for me. A dream I've had for years. One I still possess. I had packed my suitcase with great care. Including my Pepto-Bismol. Something I never left home without and usually the first thing I packed making any trip.

On the final night I realized that I managed to make it through the whole trip without a single, um, digestive problem...if you know what I mean. I used to have a very sensitive stomach and was very concerned that I would be plagued throughout the trip with numerous runs to any available restroom.

Which given the country, there weren't going to be a whole lot of options when we were out. If I was lucky (or should I say blessed since this is about a mission trip? *wink*), a communal outhouse would be available.

When I reached the end of this trip without any issues, I was thrilled. And thankful. You can question my faith, I just know that this was a reality for me for years. Throw on top of that an extremely sketchy food and water system and some unsanitary and unsavory conditions. Then add other team members afflictions and you can't help but wonder if you might be next.

I was thinking on this personal "miracle" as I dressed for a special goodbye service at our host church. And that's when it hit. I started having abdominal cramping and knew what would soon follow. I informed my roommate (a very dear friend of mine) that I was not feeling well and quickly moved to our hotel bathroom. Where I remained for the next twenty minutes.

I could hear the rest of our team gathering outside the hotel to load our bus and my roommate was urging me to make haste. Not exactly something that I felt was in my control. I prayed. I cried. I writhed as only one on a toilet can writhe.

By this point, the whole team, all 20 or so blessed people, knew my "condition". Several other team members gathered to encourage me to just get on the bus. They all knew. Twenty men and women knew I was stuck on the pot. I was mortified.

To be continued...

Farewell To Summer 2009

Last year I posted a few somethings that happened during summer 2008. So I thought I'd share a few somethings from summer 2009. Makes sense, right?

Maybe not, sense may or may not be something I'm accused of possessing...like when I put a wig on my baby. It still makes me snicker.

Until I think of my baby being compared to George Costanza's mother (Seinfeld).

My summer somethings. Version 2009.

• Something I found - a love for the Waltons tv series, I had never watched it until this summer
  
• Something I lost - a lot of vegetables in our garden to our abundance of town wildlife
  
• Something I learned - when Samuel draws on himself it releases an inner tribal instinct, complete with grunting and muscle making
• Something I wish I could forget - seven toys can fit in my toilet drain, it's now a known fact
• Something fun - staying up all night playing board games with my brothers and sisters
  
• Something not so fun - getting up at the crack of dawn with little ones after playing games all night with my brothers and sisters
• Something I worried about - Samuel's broken arm
  
• Something that drove me to my knees - the direction of our country
  
• Something sweet - the flowers and gift already waiting for me at our restaurant table on our anniversary
• Something ugly - my dental bills and the work I still need to have done
  
• Something I coveted- a Jersey milk cow (and land, still)
  
• Something scary - when Samuel almost drowned!
  
• Something that made me happy - my sweet, wonderful babies (all 3)
• Something unexpected - Caleb's unending appetite when it came to reading
• Something I finished - unpacking all the boxes from our kitchen renovation (from last summer)
• Something I tried - cloth diapers and I think we're ready to commit
  
• Something I made - canned goodies, like pickled peppers, peach jam, pasta sauce...

Goodnight, Jim Bob. Goodnight, Mary Ellen.

Goodnight, summer.

Dave Ramsey $999 Starter Fund Giveaway

Did you know that Dave Ramsey is giving away a Starter Emergency Fund?

Me neither.

Since 9/9/09, Dave Ramsey has been giving away $999 in a daily drawing. Go here to enter the contest. The giveaway, which you can enter daily, will last through Sept. 18th. You can at least have three shots if you go now!

The next coolest thing to actually winning would be for someone I know to win! *grin*

Meet Lenny

Lenny, meet world. World, meet Lenny.

Not your average butterfly.

We returned from a jaunt in the park this morning to find that this little beauty had kicked his chrysalis crib to the curb. It was patiently waiting for us in a jar on our kitchen table.

A friend blessed us with a Monarch caterpillar and we've had fun turning the experience into an unplanned unit study on butterflies. Hands on learning at its best! *grin*

Anyway, in the short hours that we've known him, Lenny has quickly endeared himself to our family.

Although I use the term "himself" loosely - we are having a difficult time determining "his" actual gender despite the research we have done.

Gender or not, Caleb quickly named it Lenny. Of all the names in the world and in our imagination, we pick Lenny. *No offense to any and all persons named Lenny. The name just doesn't speak, um, butterfly to me.*

This has got a child's book with the theme of redemption written all over it. Kind of an ugly duckling on steroids type of story. Lenny the Butterfly.

Just remember, you heard about it here first.

Caleb has grown extremely attached to it. And honestly, I think the little guy has become attached to him.

But then again, maybe I've just watched too many Disney movies.

The man cub has been talking about visiting Mexico and maybe running into Lenny. You can only imagine our discussion about butterfly life spans. But, he was intrigued by the thought that maybe next year we'd find one of Lenny's great-great grandchildren in our yard. I hope he always has such a tender heart.

And as a mom, I can't help but wish we had some wild tale about a butterfly who wouldn't migrate so we had to set up a special home for it. I know it's not God's way in nature, but it sure would make one little boy I know so very happy.

It would make a nice book, too.

P.S. Sorry about the quality of pictures. I'm still having issues with my computer and used these from my cell phone.

Imagination Station

Imagination. The stuff that makes childhood. There's been lots of it this summer. Which makes me happy. Except when outfits are being changed three times a day. Then I remind myself that it's time to teach Caleb how to do his own wash.

The boys reenacting the story of The Good Samaritan.

It's nothing to find Caleb in some variation of this "getup" as he pretends he's in the Civil War. Currently his favorite time period. Although, I don't think they had crocs back then.

He loves to get the little ones involved. Yes, even Abigail. Here I believe she was their field nurse during a reenactment of some battle.

Speaking of laundry, we even have issues with the clean stuff. The boys piled on layers of clothing to be big sumo wrestlers. Watching them walk was probably the funniest thing.

Ah, librarian Caleb. With the pen in his pocket.


Obviously tying a necktie is also on the list of things to learn.

One of my personal favorites, the big brothers. Because they had "big muscles". Otherwise known as more clean laundry.

Clearly I need to find another spot for clothes waiting to be folded other than the couch. Or maybe not. It's seems to be so inspiring.

I love this boy's creativity and imagination. Such special gifts from God.

No Time Like The Present

Dabbing my toes back in the bloggy water. Seeing what it feels like. Wondering if I have the motivation or desire to continue. Well, more motivation than desire. Or maybe it's something else.

I've had a quadrillion (as opposed to my usual gazillion) blog posts throughout the summer that have never quite made it on here. Some started and sitting in draft mode just waiting for a chance. Poor things, sitting the bench will never be trendy. In fact, this post was started about three weeks ago. Timeliness has always been one of my best qualities. *insert huge guffaw*

I could attribute the lack of blogging to many things. Some good. Some not so good. Some just downright insane. All truthful.

Instead, I've decided that I just want to categorize it as my life being very full. Which is not a bad thing. Not a bad thing at all. And it makes me feel good. Like I made good choices.

Or maybe that's just leftover from being exposed to the D.A.R.E. program in elementary school. I will always carry certain things with me. D.A.R.E. and "Give a hoot, don't pollute" are two of them.



Seriously, my mom heard me quote that slogan in my sleep when I was little.

Anyway, I've managed to keep myself from getting too sucked up in the vortexes of cyberspace this summer. The vortexes that devour two hours of time like me when I'm left alone with rice crispy treats. Or peanut butter ice cream. Or...you get the point, in nothing flat.

So I'm proud to say that I've actually gotten quite a bit accomplished. Of course, not even an eighth of it would have happened if it weren't for Richie and the fact that he was home more this summer than in the past to lend a helping hand. Or two. What a guy! He was quite the taskmaster, I mean motivator. *wink*

But, I'm hoping to get back to blogging at least twice a week. I enjoy it and I really would like to have something fun for the kids to look at when they get older. It will still be unpredictable in content and purpose, because, well...if it weren't, then it wouldn't be me. *grin*

He Left On A Jet Plane

But I do know when he'll be back again.

Caleb left early yesterday morning with a group from our church for camp a whole lotta states away. And by early, I mean before the sun is up early. 4:30 am early. *yawn*

I was up from 1:30 am to about 3 am with butterflies and excitement mixed with a little nervousness about forgetting something, etc. I really felt like God told us to send Caleb, so I've been at peace with the decision, I just had the normal travel thing going on. I'd hate for my boy to get there and be without something important. Like clean underwear. Or his swimsuit. Or a pencil.

When I fell back asleep, I dreamt that we had missed the flight and no one had called to find out where we were. I began to try to figure out how to get Caleb to the airport in one hour (the airport they flew out of is two hours away). Then I noticed all the clocks in my house were totally different times.

That's when it turned into a nightmare because I realized someone had been in our house and deliberately changed all our clocks while we were sleeping just so we would know they had been there. I woke myself up as I was trying to decide how we could safely keep a loaded gun in our bedroom. But I digress, this is not about the inner workings of my mind.

I heard that sigh of relief...

Anyway, the man cub is whooping it up at this awesome camp very far from home and I am so excited for him. They've got horseback riding, water slides, a lake, arcades, go-karts, a carousel, and so much more! Not your everyday summer church camp.

He'll be back in a few days for a brief pit stop before he heads to Cub Scout camp. Brief as in less than 24 hours. Turning our home into a bed and breakfast. Oh well, I look forward to seeing his smile, hearing his stories, hugging his skinny body, and sniffing him as all good mothers do.

One of My Favorite Kitchen Gadgets

With all the onions we've been cutting up from our garden to dehydrate, I've fallen more and more in love with my stainless steel "soap" bar. The bar helps remove any bad odors on your hands from the kitchen. You wash your hands using cold water, soap, and the bar and voila - any lingering odors will be quickly removed.

Onions. Garlic. You name it. I am amazed almost every time I use it. It's almost a game for me to check my hands and see if any smell remains. I know, I know. I have serious entertainment issues...

I originally bought mine about 7 years ago through a fundraiser so I don't know the exact type I have, but this one is pretty similar. I think I purchased mine for around $5-7. It's gone from accessory to neccesity for me.

Just wanted to share something that Works For Me!

Them Bones, Them Bones, Them Broken Bones

On Sunday night we had a family first...and hopefully last. Our first broken bone. Our first trip to the emergency room for any of our children.

My sweet, sunshiney Samuel broke his arm. He was climbing up the slide of our swingset (something he has done at least a gazillion times), lost his balance, and fell about five feet to the ground. Richie and I were in the front yard (the swingset is on one side of the house), so we didn't see it happen.

And after hearing Caleb's description of the fall - which he also generously reenacted despite my discouragement - I am thankful I was not a witness to the actual event. Saying this boy keeps me on my toes (and knees!) may just be understatement of the year.

We prayed for Samuel and put some ice on his lower arm and wrist. There was very little swelling, no bruising, he could move his wrist and all his fingers with no ill effects, and he was crying off and on, but certainly not what I would have expected with a fracture. The people in the emergency room even looked a bit skeptical a few times. It's amazing to me and I know God was all over it.

After three hours at the hospital they wrapped it in an ace bandage, put a splint over it, and sent us on our way. And Monday morning he was climbing up the slide again! Unbelievable. Perhaps the real testimony is that I haven't gone into cardiac arrest. *grins*

Tuesday we went and had a hard cast put on, which I had never seen done before. The cast extends from his mid-upper arm to his hand. He will have it on for 3 weeks and then he will have it replaced with a shorter cast. I have a picture of him, but my computer is acting up again, so I'll have to try it later.

Overall, he is doing well. He's ready to get the cast off, but then again, so am I!